Sunday, January 31

For a few minutes she thinks she might throw up. She takes someone else's glass and takes small sips. She continues making conversation. It passes. Nobody notices.

Saturday, January 30

Friday, January 29

blue-tit CHIIP CHIIPs in time with the radio

Thursday, January 28

something in my eye

coconut cleanser draws a blurry film between me and the world

Wednesday, January 27

Tuesday, January 26

Monday, January 25

Purdy passes on the perimeter, a mouse gift in her mouth

Sunday, January 24

Maddy leaves Winnie the Pooh in charge of the other toys whilst we go to the park. I ask whether she ever leaves her cat Trisha in charge. 'Don't be silly,' she says, 'she's only a cat.'

sign outside the pub


Friday, January 22

saved from the pavement

single miniature shoe perches on the post by the railway crossing

Thursday, January 21

Wednesday, January 20

oh falling snow, melt on the ground as you would on the tip of a tongue

Tuesday, January 19

by the motorway

brown paper bag
a beast

unopened packet
of Christmas baubles
the hedge

Monday, January 18

Sunday, January 17

washing up, cleaning the cat litter, drinking juice, shaving legs, removing fluff, feeding the birds, walking to the car, slight headache, opening mail, folding blankets, pausing to feel the sun on my face, NOT GETTING IN THE WAY OF LIVING, BUT LIFE

Saturday, January 16

afternoon tea for me and Charlie (thank you Sarah)

six crumbly cheese biscuits speckled with poppy and sesame seeds
six golden meringues melting on our tongues
ten tiny perfect scones with home-made blackcurrant jam and lashings and lashings of cream

Friday, January 15

the hunt

driving through the mist in strange country lanes, twilight, snow still lingering on the verges.
a man and woman gallop towards me full pelt. they are not smiling.

Thursday, January 14


Squirrel digs in the snow with his curl in the air, and I'm about to take pity and throw him some nuts when he rises with his black gold and skitters back to the walnut tree.

Tuesday, January 12

old friends

back this morning: breakfasting deer, clutch of blue-tits, buddha mistle thrush

Monday, January 11

Sunday, January 10

fat speckled mistle thrush sits in the snowy tree day after day, a bird buddha

Saturday, January 9

some objects act as a boat to rivers of underground pain

Friday, January 8

Thursday, January 7

cat-paw-sized holes criss-cross the snow on the frozen swimming pool

Wednesday, January 6

Tuesday, January 5

pale salmon pink picks out the fluffed-out edges of the clouds

Sunday, January 3

The daffodils on the windowsill reach up for the colour their sleeping petals know.

Saturday, January 2

She signed up to be a therapist but killed herself before the new term started.

Friday, January 1

where would I rather be?

two warm duvets. two cats. six books. warm chestnuts. chocolate biscuits. the clock strikes in a new year.